I call back all my power and all my energy from cik (san rafael)

This is the third time writing this for whatever reason something has erased this previous post but this goes out to you c i k yes I'm airing out all of our dirty laundry or at least my experiences with you and my need to be with you or lack thereof for I never needed to be with you and I never should I chase you because I've gotten nothing back... And yes I'm going to accuse you of this spiritual problem I have it picks up every time I'm upset with you... You have no clue how frightened I've been being your friend or attempting to be with you in any way shape or form.. and all I ever asked was for a little bit of compassion or care or concern for you to be a man and apologize for getting me so worked up and you're nothing to get worked up over you should look at yourself in the mirror... What woman in her right mind would want you not like I'm perfect either but at least I have my partials at least I tried to look good at least I tried to be good but I'm done being good the people like you ugly on the outside as well as ugly on the inside... But for some reason I found you appealing in a gobliness sort of way... I hereby publicly break every chain every connection mental and spiritual and friendship I don't want to touch any of my old friends because you have painted them you have kept them from me and they were cruel enough to listen to you... You bought their friendship... You inserted yourself as king of that of those lands.. and if you want I didn't go there and I haven't because you f****** ruined it... Are you happy you f****** ruined something for me you ruined my f****** friend but the least you could have done was if you were coming up here bring one or two of them up here with you but no that wasn't possible because then you wouldn't be able to treat me like s*** and get what you want with them around... You isolate girls and you treat them like crap I wish I knew the name of the girl that put a hammer in your window and why you ever showed me that picture is beyond me but hey I feel her pain I like to put a hammer in your window too... And I remember when I asked what did you do to make her so mad " I didn't do what she wanted me to do for her" and what was that go down on her? Or was that just me ? Did you really really feel so awesome putting me down making me feel like s*** so many times did he ever try to make me feel better when I chipped my tooth during sex? Did you ever suggest that maybe I shouldn't use with you no no you can never suggest it such a thing cuz you like to watch me fall apart... I remember times where I was in a perfectly good mood but you tried everything to get me to cry it was frustrating everything became a struggle with you why did you even want to meet up with me you sick f*** if you don't like me then not spend time with me... And come to think of it I was really f****** cute I was nice I was loving I was just weird but you couldn't tell me that you can never tell me that you like me for who I was you would always try to teach me something as if I was f****** stupid... I never try to make you feel stupid I invite you into my home time and time again... Well don't think it's good was the last time I will have sex with you ever again I can't stand the way that you won't allow me to think like oh finally we're going to work it out... And then you don't answer the phone you know check your messages or clear them out or unblock my number you're such a sorry f*** m***********? I'm still done being used I'm so done being used by you I want my 13 years back I want all of my youth back I want all of my creativity my business skill back I want it all back from you I'm calling you out c i k women in California if you meet this jerk off keep on walking he's got some weird charm but I don't think it's human I think it's simply f****** demonic you are a demonic f****** addict.. so much weird s*** has happened since I've known you and I felt it and I was terrified but now I'm just laughing at you I'm laughing at how f****** nice I've been to a complete a****** you broke my heart more than once you abandoned me more than once and I still tried to be with you and you can never appreciate that ever... I f****** deserve better and I believe I will get on just fine in my life without you because apparently you can without me and I was never anything to you because I now have this disability that I've allowed to eat me up pretty bad but just to spite you I will heal myself I will walk and I will ride my bike I will even have a vehicle someday and hopefully run your ass over I used to think you're pretty skinny but you kind of have a fat belly yeah you're not the most attractive man and with that being said you should have been a little bit nicer a little bit more caring because I will never care about you again I'll never want to be with you again and the connection that you shared with me is f***** I hereby publicly break it and I shame you with it and I stick it back to you everything I felt the fear the anxiety the guilt that shouldn't be mine f*** you man and empath is nothing to f*** with... Yes empath meaning I can feel everything and even see some stuff so I return it all back to you your heart loose f****** fiend... I call back off my love and energy everything I gave to you I call back whether or not you have any of my writings or any of my gifts I called them back to me or to leave your being you do not deserve the things of giving you a poor girl giving a rich man items I ever get anything back maybe about three dinners out in public over 13 years never any bubbles never out to a movie never anything nice...accept more drugs.. all right guys so I would be stupid enough to f*** you again it would be great sex only for 3 days later for you to put me down and to cry my eyes out I cry my eyes out for a worm of a man... I remember the time after the field you told me you looked at me and you changed me by saying your mother should be ashamed of you... Like wise m***********.. your mother should be ashamed of you she should have kept you drowning in that f****** pool at 5 years old... Make sure that you tell all the time reminds me of my story at 5 and how you got over your fear I don't know why I looked up to you to be the one to help me to get to where I wanted to be but I see all signs of you kept me down the whole entire time I met you... I always felt so ashamed of the things I liked or where I'd come from I let you of all people shame me worse than my own f****** mother... You are a f****** nightmare of a man... You are selfish you're a drug addicted egotistical piece of s***... I pray to God that anyone that recognizes your initials and recess f****** takes it to heart that you are an a****** you are not worth loving or caring or trying to chase for 13 years 13 f****** years I still get treated like crap after I give you what you want... I understand I'm not your girlfriend I never will be because I'm not worthy what the f*** ever I'm cuter I have all my teeth and I know who I am I don't split people from knowing each other you're a liar... And a f****** thief... Your stupid electrical bike deserve to go missing if it's true that you run it with you camping on that f****** stupid field duh of course it's going to go missing that's not the place to take the bike like that you f****** retard duh... Maybe you should have your boyfriend Dave buy you a new one... By the way I hope I do meet Dave someday and encourage him to leave you behind that you don't deserve his friendship or any of the cool toys that you get from him cuz you treat women like toys... When I told you I had problems with electricity or weird things did you even seem concerned or that you want to help out no... Know how frustrating it is to want to be with someone that you can speak to without fear... You suck man you never went down on me you always made me feel dirty you made me feel disgusting when it's really you mother f*** God your mother must be so upset I hope she passes soon so that she doesn't have the deal with a disappointment of an a****** son like you your other brothers have to be better than you I swear to God I hope they are hey it's not fair that I wasn't allowed to meet you family I don't know why they probably would have really liked me... But in your mind I'm horrific you can't be seen with me are you f****** kidding me I would have made you look good you're the one that looks bad... Oh by the way you owe me a new mattress... You owe me a lot you owe me 13 years of my f****** energy back ... I told you I was depressed recently gee thanks for calling me and seeing if I'm okay after I screwed you two or three days in a row... You don't care that I want to hang out with you because you don't want to hang out with me you're busy you're busy playing bad guy you're busy playing drug addict Robin Hood drug addict and which is exactly what you are and one of these days he won't have anywhere to hide and I hope when your parents pass they won't give you any where to live it's plain to see that you like living outside with the dirt the grime the crime and the drama... Goodbye C.I.K. and I send you all my pain all the crap that you have made me feel especially the loneliness and the heartache and the thoughts the weird creepy thoughts that don't f****** stop and they are filled with fear and she's still her too it's just a picture of the field or part of it or where we camped ... Ask other people in that area they will tell you that area is tapped with tons of spiritual energy probably a lot of them will agree with what I have to say or have said... I'm sure you know that if you're willing to ask a question on someone else's level whether than your own they're not that f****** smart and you just act it because you have a way with people people don't people don't argue with you... Goodbye c okay no one I'm sure will ever love you the way that I try to love you..