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In real estate transactions, abruptly ending communication—often called an "Irish Goodbye"—can have significant consequences. While sometimes justified to exit a fruitless negotiation, ghosting your real estate agent or skipping a closing is generally a bad practice that can lead to legal and financial complications. Based on industry experience, the acceptability of this tactic depends entirely on the scenario, with clear communication almost always being the superior approach.
When a real estate agent isn't meeting expectations, some sellers or buyers consider disappearing instead of having a difficult conversation. An agent might spend hours preparing a CMA (Comparative Market Analysis), a report that compares similar recently sold properties to determine a home's value, only for a seemingly eager client to vanish.
John Sieling, an agent in Portland, Oregon, notes this happens a couple of times a year. "After having that first one-on-one meeting and then delivering a CMA, they'll disappear," he says. This practice is inefficient and unprofessional. Ghosting an agent can lead to misunderstandings and delays for everyone. Since agents in a local market often know each other, being caught in this situation can damage your reputation. A direct, honest conversation is the recommended way to part ways.
While less common, agents who work on commission can also be tempted to disengage from unrealistic clients. Cam Dowski, a real estate investor in Chicago, recalls working extensively with buyers whose expectations were unattainable. "It was tiring, and I started avoiding their calls and emails because I didn't know what else to do," he admits.
However, Dowski acknowledges that avoiding the confrontation was a mistake. The professional resolution is to communicate openly with clients about market realities. Setting clear, achievable expectations from the outset prevents wasted time and frustration for both parties.
The negotiation phase of a real estate deal can be a frustrating "roller coaster," making the idea of walking away appealing. Danny Johnson, an investor in San Antonio, experienced this during prolonged negotiations for a historic home. After the sellers repeatedly changed their terms and caused significant delays, Johnson decided to cease all communication.
In this specific case, the Irish goodbye was a justified business decision. If the other party demonstrates a clear unwillingness to reach a reasonable agreement, disengaging can be a necessary step to avoid further wasted effort. Johnson reports the property remained unsold nearly a year later, validating his decision to walk away.
After the arduous process of showings, inspections, and negotiations, a seller might be tempted to skip the closing appointment and simply wait for the check. This is one scenario where an Irish goodbye is strongly discouraged.
Failing to attend the closing can have serious legal and financial implications. Even if state law doesn't require your physical presence, unforeseen issues can arise. The buyer's mortgage approval could fall through at the last minute, or a problem with the title (the legal documentation of ownership) might surface. Scott Sloan, a real estate attorney in Dallas, advises, "Based on our experience assessment, it's crucial for sellers to fulfill their obligations and attend the closing to ensure a smooth transfer of ownership."
It's common for curious buyers to slip into an open house without introducing themselves to the hosting agent, and sometimes to leave just as discreetly. While this isn't the most egregious behavior, buyers should consider the opportunity cost. You might miss key information about the property that isn't obvious from a self-guided tour, such as the reason for selling or recent renovations. A brief conversation with the agent could provide valuable insights.
To navigate real estate relationships professionally:
